Last week was the last day for my IELTS class. I read in another blog that after they complete their IELTS course, they can reach the minimum score to be allowed in register the overseas university. Yeah I'm happy with their achievement, but I'm feeling disappointed with my capability. My last prediction test was terrible, especially in reading section. My concentration distracted during the test, because the guy who sat next to me is extremely clever, he could finish every section so fast and yeah, I didn't finish my reading test, I didn't answer about 10 numbers. And the most heartbreaking moment when my native teacher told me to take a course in General English, to enrich my vocabulary and also fixing my grammar. Oh My God, I'm tired in attending english course because this IELTS course is the third class that I've been taking since January 2015. Moreover there's no guarantee to success in IELTS if I take any more courses.
I think I've made the readers on this blog feeling confused. A few years ago, I vehemently told in this blog that I really want to be advertising worker. But now, I need something more challenging in my life. I'm not comfortable if I do the same things everyday and you have to know that the graphic of my daily life is currently stagnant. It's terrible, guys. I don't want to be like my colleagues who spending their whole time here, especially if their incumbency never change during that long time. Stagnant skills and stagnant salary for many years.... Hmm, sounds awful for me. Improvement is a need, at least for myself. When I could reach a goal, reaching another goals is a must. Becoming a foreign student is amazing, guys. You can enhance your skill in your aspired scope, learn a new culture even the psychology of a society in abroad, and don't forget, the ability of English language also can be increased. You can find another perspective from people in another country.
I still remember about my previous dream to become an art director in advertising agency. Since my company have different regulation about separating graphic designer and art director team, I'm no longer think about that dream, neither my occupation as a graphic designer. As I said before, my passion as a graphic designer starting to become zero. I miss those challenging arena. Everyday I only do my revision, both from the client and account director (???). Sometimes I miss to take a part of a pitch or new project, but I'm a lil bit trauma of getting revision from the account team, because they don't send my project to the clients before getting approval by them whereas I have a creative director to monitor my project. It's like your design is for account director, not for the clients, because she thinks that she knows what client wants. And then clients will think that the speed of graphic designers in my company while doing a project are sooooo slow because I have to revise my design based on what the account team want. Horrible.
Back to the topic. Previously I don't think that my english course will as far as happened now. At first I only thought about preparing myself to work in multinational company but my previous english classmate make me think about taking master degree. They inspired me a lot because some of them were attending in master class at UI. They introduced me about LPDP, the scholarship from ministry of finance. Yeah, they were funded by LPDP for their master education. After completing my english course at LBI, I met more incredible friends at IALF and I realized that I'm still far from being a clever student. You can see from this article, a lot of grammatical error, kan? But I won't give up, I have to prove, at least for myself, that I can reach my dreams. I have to push myself into the limit, to change my life, to push me into more challenging arena. This is funny, I want to study hard in my 20s, not in my teens age. But it's okay since somebody said that we have to learn in our whole life. Since I got some comments from the readers of this blog that they feeling inspired after read this blog, I was determined to always be able in inspiring many people in many ways. Thanks guys :')
If you don't go for your dreams, what is your life about?
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